I had this conversation with a Greek guy friend, S, some time ago. And I think it helped me define who I am, what I want, or how raunchy (or not) I can be.

S: Have you had sex in public places? 

TBG: Erm, I’m not much of an exhibitionist, I think. Inside a car, probably. What about you?

S: Well, I had once, in the comfort room of a coffee shop.

TBG: Oh, that’s not so public. I mean, you’re still behind closed doors. If that’s the definition you go by, then yes, I’ve done it in a bar’s VIP CR a couple of times. But it’s not my thing, I guess.

S: Yeah? So what’s your thing then? Tell me.

TBG: Weeelllll, I believe in privacy. Doing it behind closed doors no matter how cramped. It’s your chance to connect with another person, nevermind that s/he’s just a one night stand. It gets distracting if you are mindful of getting caught or of people passing by. You lose your chance of making sex good for each other.

S: I had sex along the stairs of our apartment. It was exciting.

TBG: I guess it works for you. I mean, I understand the whole excitement bit, but I’m more concerned of making it really good. And I hate having to hurry because of fear of getting caught. I like to take my time. I like to tease. I love to talk and build up the anticipation. Talking and tracing my fingers across his body. Caressing. Mindfuck.

S: Is it worth it? What if the need is unbearable and you have to do it right then and there and it doesn’t matter where you are? Isn’t that exciting?

TBG: Well, you might as well be dogs.

So, what’s your thing?